Keep Breathing..

“You know, I don’t think anybody deserves this-“

“Yes they do. Some people deserve it. Deserve to live in this misery, this hollowness that they feel in themselves, because they deserve it. They- they…mistreated it, or took it too far, or- or…they took it for granted. So this happens to them, so that they grow and learn and never do it again, So that later they know better. And the only thing you did wrong, was give them too much freedom to do it to you over and over again, you chose to not do anything. You could’ve stopped it, put an end to it. Said no. But you chose not to do anything. You chose to be miserable. And now you have to live through that.”

At that moment, I fell in love with her. I fell in love with her uncontrollable spirit, her subtle beauty and her gentle grace. It wasn’t the I-want-to-spend-the-rest-of-my-life-with-you love. It was the kind of love that I wanted her to be happy more than anything, and wanting to save her from whatever battle she was in.

Breathing hard, she turned away and looked at anything and everything but me. I continued to look at her, people might consider it staring, but I couldn’t help it. She did something to me. She woke me up. She actually changed my perspective on my life.

And after that speech what am I supposed to say? I’m not even going to bother responding to that. I came out for a walk to clear my head in this cold, and I got a lecture on how I chose to be miserable.

How did it all come to this? I sat on the bench after walking for about an hour. And then I’m pouring all my life’s problems out in the open like I’m talking to a therapist.

“So, what do you suggest I do?” I ask as she stands to leave.

Lifting her head up to the sky. She looks at it with such intensity as if the answer was written in the clouds passing us by. I lift my head and try to see what she sees, hoping to find the answer too.

“Keep breathing?” she answers as she walks away, out of my life.

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8 Responses to “Keep Breathing..”


  1. 1 chikapappi September 18, 2007 at 5:16 pm

    Hmm… I guess it’s cuz of fasting am not getting this! Who’s going to the shrink!

  2. 2 GreY September 18, 2007 at 8:50 pm

    * lost it * .. Explain !

  3. 3 Swair September 18, 2007 at 10:12 pm

    ee wallaaahh.. i guess breathing’s the only thing people have in common (people who choose to be miserable)…

  4. 4 N. September 19, 2007 at 7:01 am

    I loved that, really. I dunno, I’m speechless! I liked this the most, “Lifting her head up to the sky. She looks at it with such intensity as if the answer was written in the clouds passing us by.”

  5. 5 Blue Dress September 20, 2007 at 8:45 pm

    Keep Breathing by ingrid!

  6. 6 TAT September 21, 2007 at 12:16 am

    breath and stop and think a minute hmmm
    No one knows misery better than me but girl you tripping if you think the clouds would contain an answer my advice is follow me to your own demise 🙂

  7. 7 MishMisha September 21, 2007 at 12:22 pm

    chikapappi,
    lool what don’t you get exactly?? and nobody’s going to a shrink, he felt like he was at a shrink LOL

    GreY,
    loool what do you want explained exactly??

    Swair,
    yeah i guess so

    N.,
    hehe i’m glad you liked it..

    Blue Dress,
    omg i was actually listening to it at one point when i was writing it LOL

    TAT,
    lool it was a figure of speech.. she was staring at the clouds so hard that it was like she was trying to find the answer in the clouds… that didn’t even explain it LOL

  8. 8 Touché October 5, 2007 at 7:57 pm

    “Grieving has been good to me”
    Tuesdays with Morrie


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